My Camden

This was supposed to be for Time Out but I wrote it wrong and they sent it back.


I moved to Camden in 2002 mainly because of Pump up the Volume at the Underworld. It probably doesn’t exist anymore but I’m too lazy to move again. The Stables Market stopped making sense to me about three years ago when it turned into a cross between Blade Runner and the Super Mario movie, but I’m still rather fond of it, and pisses me off that they’re knocking it down and making it fancy. Apparently there’s going to be a Topshop there, which is cool because it does take a whole fifteen minutes on the bus to get to the WORLD’S BIGGEST TOPSHOP (fact).

This kind of stealthy developing has been happening all over Camden recently. The other week the five pound noodle shop closed down. I can’t even begin to express the void this has left in my life. I can’t imagine paying more than five pounds for a bowl of noodles and I don’t want to. Thankfully my favourite local haunt is part of a global conglomerate and in no danger of closing down soon. Most days I sit outside Fresh and Wild eating apple crisps and wait for Graham Coxon to walk by. He probably looks at me and thinks – that girl has too much spare time. In which case I would have to say – right back at you Graham.

In really good weather I’ll walk further up Parkway to the zoo. If you walk around it you can see the zebras, giraffes, emus and some barnyard animals. I’d like to find the wolf cages from the end of Withnail and I, where Richard E. Grant performs the speech from Hamlet. There’s a book store down by the lock where you can probably pick up a copy for about 50p, but hey, I’ve always thought it would look better as a changing room.